I've been all over the place the past several months. Mad, sad, and everything in between. I never understood how people could undergo such an emotional roller coaster without there being something wrong- until recently. It really isn't something understood until you've lived it.
Am I ashamed of my varying emotions? No. Not a bit. Because e all cope with things in a different way. But especially given that when anyone sustains a series of unfortunate events you simply do your best to contend with what you get dealt.
I especially love how during my theme park of emotions- lol- my friends were there for me. And they respected my privacy to not gossip about how random I'd be at times. No no this isn't a tale of misconduct or anything like that. Just some days I'd be exhausted from the stress and others I was able to put my game face on!
But no one likes that feeling when ya know you're personal situations are repeated to third parties in a gossiping manner. It's not like I have proof or anything. Just a gut feeling if you will. And this next thing isn't meant to be an arrogant remark at all- but my gut feelings are usually spot on.
I dunno it just sucks having to accept the reality that you will encounter people who don't respect ya and sometimes those people are friends. But if I've learned anything from the past two years its this; people may not always appear to be who they really are. That doesn't mean you shouldn't give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I don't ever want to lose the believe that people are inherently good. And if given the opportunity they will do good.
So I guess in writing this I'm acknowledging this fact about an aspect of life but I'm ok with it. I'm not gonna allow it to change me. At the end of the day all any of us can do is stay true to our conscience.
P.S. I'm gonna begin to utilize this blog more I've forgotten how relaxing writing can be.
Until next time!
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